A Servants Heart

A servant is a person who does duties for others, a devoted and helpful follower. If we pause for a moment, we can all think of at least one person who we know that is always doing for others. Sometimes this person is doing for their community at large and other times they are doing on a smaller level. I recently read a book about All Saints Day to my 2nd grade catechism students. They were fascinated by how these saints were a beautiful mix of people who served in big ways and others that served in small ways. We discussed how many of the canonized saints did big things and even gave their lives, but others simply loved the people around them.

I have been reflecting on the life of my Gram. I am not sure she would ever call herself a servant, let alone a servant of God. Yet, that is exactly what she was. She was a servant to her family, church, and without even realizing it end up serving around the world. See like we believers are His arms and legs throughout the world my Gram is a servant around the world through each and every one of her children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. Touching hearts in small ways reaches hearts for lifetimes in places beyond our reach.

My Gram found herself raising 8 children born within 10 years. As I understand it, they were active children that found all sorts of ways to have fun. She raised them by doing it all, cooking, cleaning, cutting hair, canning, and still attending church. Though she may tell you she only went to have time away for the peace and quiet. I always found it interesting that she and Grandpa took turns going to church until the kids had received their First Communion.

My Grandfather died in his 50s when they still had children at home and in their teens. So, now she is a single parent to those 8 children and some of whom are now married with children. She met the challenge of raising those kids and helping to care for her grandchildren. She was always cooking, cleaning, canning, cutting hair, and singing in the choir. I remember spending the night at her house as often as I could and attending Mass with her. It was so exciting to me to see her singing in the choir.

As time went on, she began to have what we came to call monthly birthday breakfast where we all gathered to celebrate all the birthdays of the month. There were piles of pancakes, eggs, sausage, and toast with homemade jam. If anyone walked into her home with us there, because so many others did make their way into our family, they would see her buzzing around making sure every need was taken care of. There she was still cooking, cleaning, canning, and praying the rosary. I have fond memories of so many that were welcomed into our family because my Gram opened her heart & door to them.

As I grew older, I came to learn about what me Gram meant to others. It has been such a blessing to hear she was just always so kind. Or that she was just the sweetest lady. She was spreading love to her community when she played cards, shopped at the local grocery stores, and behind the counter as a bank teller. Even when she was doing that she was still cooking, cleaning, canning, and praying. She was just always willing to do for others but many times the way she DID for others was just showing love.

Looking at her children and my cousins I see hard workers, people who strive, but who are always willing to give. They give by opening their homes and cooking for members in their community. Like handing out food to the needy in the streets of Seattle. They give by cleaning in ways of helping a neighbor rake leaves, or like making sure people in poor communities have fresh water. They give by canning up the love she gave them and handing it out in heaping piles throughout all the land by smiling, hugging, sharing compassion, finding ways to be kind, and giving more than they receive. She set an example of giving in her way for the purpose He gave her and then her many arms and legs have taken that to a greater level.

Walking through my Gram’s home you will find Him in every room with sayings, statues, or other artwork. My Gram may not have told you to get to church but she set an example of someone that was fed at her church and spilled that into the lives of those around her. I later learned she prayed her rosary many times a day with the intention of her family. She trusted us all to Him and how hard that is to do. She sat in her chair praying for us . . . each and every one of us every single day. Look around and see what her prayers have done. I pray we all can pick up where she left off because there are still many generations to our tree to come.

At All Saints Day Mass, November 1, 2022, Father Cotter gave the best homily for me in that moment. He shared the stories for some great Saints that were martyred for their faith. He went on to say, “but today is not their day they have their own feast day. Today is for all the moms, dads, single men & women that all served Him in their small ways each and every day. Today is the day we celebrate those saints in Heaven.” That was special for many reasons because I had just labeled our Gram our Patron Saint the night before.

I end with . . . Gram she would ask, “What should I do?” several times during my time with her at the end of her life. She just wanted to be doing. I told her it was time for her to finally sit down at the table and rest . . . to sit at His table and rest. Once she said, “Who will do the dishes?” I told her, “Gram, you raised us well, it is our turn to do the dishes.” So, my dear uncles, aunts, and cousins I challenge you to pick up your towel and get the dishes done . . .the dishes of prayer, the dishes of serving your communities, the dishes of passing on the faith to all you meet, the dishes of welcoming others into your embrace, the dishes of being who she raised us all to be.

It Is Time To … Live Full Walk Free

As my regular readers know I journal more than I write. So, if this is your first time reading my blog please know that I just let the words flow and try to make it readable later. Hopefully, you enjoy.

This past September I had made plans for others to take care of our kids while I attended a Women’s Retreat at Grace Adventures. As the weekend came closer I realized I never received a confirmation notice. I brushed it off thinking it would arrive the week prior. When it did not I thought I should call to check on things, but I was also beginning to wonder if I really wanted to go…all by myself. After talking to someone at Grace I learned I was in fact not registered, but there was still room. My head was saying “Just stay home. Save the money.” My gut was saying “Go! Go! Go!” I learned a long time ago to pick up my anxiety, emotion, and listen to my gut…so planning to go continued. Oh, and by the way I just picked the weekend that worked for my parents to have the kids I never even looked at who the speaker was going to be. It would be a random weekend away all by myself. Enough with the back story…

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The Key Note Speaker that weekend was Cindy Bultema, who would be sharing with us four times that weekend (5 if you attended her break out session) from the book of 1 Corinthian’s, is from west Michigan, a writer/speaker, a wife, and Mom of four kids.  I can’t say it was a POWERFUL weekend for myself, but I can say that it was a weekend I needed to move myself forward in my own thoughts about serving others. I did LOVE Cindy’s talk and learned a GREAT deal about what was happening in Corinth when Paul wrote these letters. I watched as many women made huge steps forward in their own faith, in their own walk with Jesus, and in their journey to shed shame, guilt, and negative self-talk. It was a weekend I needed for many reasons and I pray it was the beginning of a next phase in my own journey, but for me watching the work God did in the lives of others was awe inspiring.

I came home and immediately started a bible study in my home. I stepped out and trusted God to lead those that needed the time in His word, needed time with other women, or were searching for something, through my door. It was an emotional time for me to just put it out there and I can’t explain how my heart rejoiced as others joined me. Going through that eight weeks with three other ladies and starting a Facebook group that others joined through was a blessing that filled all of our hearts. We completed Cindy’s study Red Hot Faith during the time I was blessed to be apart of the launch team for Cindy’s new Bible Study Live Full Walk Free. This new study was where she pulled her talk from for the weekend retreat that impacted women for Him and I am sure it tore down walls that were keeping them from being all He made them to be.  I want that for everyone…for all of you!!

I have not completely read the study, because I wanted to go through it with my Bible Study in February. I did skim through it and loved what I found in those 60,000 words!!! My heart truly believes this study will impact many for our Lord. Cindy worked very hard on this, she allowed God to lead her, and she struggled to get it written all for HIM to reach YOU…YOU, ME, and EVERYONE that goes through it.

Before I end I wanted to share some of Cindy’s thoughts…

Can you tell us a little bit about your new study and why you chose to use Corinth?

Live Full, Walk Free: Set Apart in a Sin-Soaked World is a six-session Bible study book and DVD series based on 1 Corinthians. I love how God’s Word contains instructions on every (yes, every) situation we might face in life—even instructing us on how to live set-apart lives right in the middle of today’s confused culture. Whether women have been studying the Bible for decades, or are still trying to figure this “Jesus thing” out, I hope they’ll find relevant material that meet them right where they are on their spiritual journey.

I picked 1 Corinthians because Paul wrote this letter to church members living in the “Sin City” of their day. (So when you see 1st & 2nd Corinthians, think 1st & 2nd Las Vegas!) The church members in Corinth were surrounded by immorality, idolatry and indulgence, much like our culture today. Together we can learn from Paul’s wisdom to the Corinthians as he addressed issues such as identity, unity, purpose, purity, as well as overcoming temptations. Good stuff!

What do you hope readers glean from Live Full, Walk Free?

Freedom in every area of their life—including their sexuality. I often meet women who are weighed down by the pain and humiliation of their sexual pasts, even many years later. I’ve shed tears with countless friends who expressed feeling intense guilt for premarital sex, having an abortion, affair, or other sexual sins. I’ve walked with beautiful women who disclosed their excruciating stories of childhood sexual victimization. They know it’s not their fault, they should “move on.” They’ve tried to live forgiven and free, yet, they can’t shake the shame.

Unfortunately I think sex is one of Satan’s favorite lures. Clearly he’s using sexual sin to hook our culture:  Porn is rampant, sexting among teens is commonplace, and we can’t even go to the grocery store for salad fixings without seeing sexual images on the covers of checkout magazines.

For many women, living in our sex-crazed culture has drastically impacted one’s ability to live full and walk free. Trust me: I get it. For a girl like me with a past like mine, I know what it’s like to be burdened with regret, disappointment, heavy hurts. No judgment here, only grace.

This I know based on the authority of God’s Word: no matter what you have done, or what has been done to you—Jesus Christ came so you might live full and walk free. You are not the one woman who has outsinned the grace and mercy of God. There is no one too far gone from God’s amazing grace!

With over 15 years of ministry experience, Cindy is a popular women’s speaker, author, and Bible teacher. But don’t let her cheerful smile fool you—Cindy has endured single parenting, overcome bondage to addiction, and survived tragic loss.Cindy’s latest Bible study, Live Full Walk Free was released in December 2016. Cindy lives in Michigan with her husband and their four kids. Most days you can find Cindy walking her beagle Rocky, attending one of her boys’ hockey games, or serving hot lunch at her kids’ school.

Once we get into the study I will be sharing live about the study on my #LateNightTruthChats via Facebook Live on my blog page. Please click the link to like my page and get notifications to hear those chats to learn more about my thoughts on this study and … well whatever I am led to share. Until then please check out the link below and get your own copy of Cindy’s beautiful book. If you want to join a group you are welcome in my home or to join our Facebook Bible Study Group just let me know!! Otherwise, like ALWAYS know I am praying for you and PLEASE pray for Cindy and I!!

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Find out more about Cindy’s new Bible study, Live Full Walk Free, plus download freebies for your own journey through 1 Corinthians here: http://www.cindybultema.com/live-full-walk-free/.

If You Love

Like I have stated before, but will repeat I am not an expert on anything. I read, journal, live, and think about it all. With that said here goes SOME of my thoughts lately. This “love” thing keeps coming up in my crazy mind and here is just another piece.

I have felt greatly the divisions in our world, country, and church all of which make me sad, but also hopeful for change. I guess I believe that only the greatest change or good can come from the greatest pits of despair. I feel like we are in some pretty great pits of despair.

In Jesus’ last days He gave us this,

“I give you a new commandment: love one another. As I have loved you, so you also should love one another. This is how all will know you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”  John 13:34-35

We Christians, or most of us, know this verse. Maybe not memorized or even know the chapter and verse. BUT we know it.  Others know all sorts of history and theology about where exactly Jesus was when he said it and every detail surrounding the moment.

Stepping away for a moment, but bringing it all together…I hope….

My Grandpa passed away on Christmas Day. On the day we celebrate the Lord’s love for us when He gave us his son, part of my family lost someone we loved. Just like Jesus’ birth was a blessing hidden in a manger my Grandpa’s death was a blessing hidden death. A quote of his that my family seems to be hanging on to in his passing was part of a toast that he shared with my brother at different holiday gatherings.

“You live and I never die.”

This evening while asking God to give me the words to write a post that I really did not feel like writing all I had were these two thoughts coming together. Before I connect them for you and even for me I need to stress two things about the verses that never sunk in for me until tonight. The first is AS I HAVE LOVED YOU … He died for us…He lived everyday for us…He sought ways to express His great love. Can I love people that way? Strangers? My enemies? The second is IF YOU HAVE LOVE FOR ONE ANOTHER. See people will know we are a disciple IF WE HAVE LOVE FOR ONE ANOTHER.  IF IF IF IF WE HAVE LOVE. No other way. The way people know that we know Jesus is if we LOVE them. How we express that love is simply HOW WE LIVE!  There we have it. To continue please allow me to substitute in a word in the scripture.

*I give you a new commandment: LIVE FOR one another. As I have LIVED for you, so you also should LIVE FOR one another. This is how all will know that you are my disciples, if you have LIVED for one another.

Now Jesus used the word love and He of course meant to. By NO MEANS do I EVER think to understand or assume anything about His meaning. Yet, I can not help, but think that if the way to SHOW people we are disciples is to love one another AND if we are to LOVE one another like He loved us. THEN wouldn’t we also have to LIVE like He did? Not perfect lives, but lives of and about LOVE. To Love someone means to Live for them.?.? Yes?? Then “We love and He never dies”.

So, can I love another like He loved me? How do we live for others to show love for others?

Is it about “Merry Christmas”?

To me this is the season my family and most of my friends celebrate Christmas. I would guess most of us recognize the reason for the season is the birth of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Does this mean that I expect everyone I meet to wish me a Merry Christmas? Nope. In fact, when I worked as a grocery store cashier for 5 years I proudly exclaimed, “Happy Holidays!” I knew not everyone that came through my line was a Christian and might be celebrating a different holiday. It was also a season that went from Thanksgiving to the New Year. Many things happen during that 5 weeks. I suppose maybe people were upset with me for not saying “Merry Christmas”, but I never thought about it back then. It seems like the past few years a great deal of attention has been placed on that.

With that said I think this topic is the beginning of something God has been stirring in me, but I have struggled with all the words. So, expect a to be continued….

I can almost pin point a time that people started attacking Christian beliefs across this country on a fairly regular basis. I can also recall the time when Christians started attacking back. It may not seem to either side that they  were/are “attacking” the other side, but more like “defending their beliefs” against attack. The problem is that to defend or be a defender means there must be an offender or offendee. I am guilty of this. We get very passionate about what we ‘know’ to be true and fight for that until, like my Mom says, “we are blue in the face.” Focusing on Christmas here, but think about it for just a moment….hasn’t there been a great deal of attacking the past…oh, 10 years or so…on many fronts?

I can not help, but think that in all our defending we have forgotten something. Both sides have forgotten something. I can not really speak for a non-Christian, but for me as a Christian when I defend my faith fiercely or even other things I believe fiercely I am attacking. Whether I intend to or not I am. I am attacking the person that disagree’s with me for believing something different than I. “Keep Christ is Christmas!” Love it myself. It is a true statement, but are we proclaiming it, shouting it, angry about it, or opening our arms to hug, hold, help, or heal like He did?

“Excuse me ma’ma. It is Christmas! Please say, ‘Merry Christmas’, rather than ‘Happy Holidays’ to me!”

Now I suppose HOW we say this may determine exactly how it is perceived, but in that moment were we spreading the LOVE of Jesus? Were we drawing people closer to Jesus? Yes, there is a truth we are called to share, but can we really share that truth spreading an “I am right” attitude? Maybe it is just me, but I feel we are called first to love each other and through that love people will find Jesus.

In no way I am I saying we shouldn’t shout from the roof tops about the GREAT LOVE that Jesus has for us! Yet, I guess I just think the best way to teach love is to show love. Jesus is my everything. By giving my everything Christmas becomes everything is was intended to be. It is not about what we say, is it? Or is it about how we say it?

So, to wrap up this portion of Love is it about the “Merry Christmas” or the Spirit of Christmas that matters? The sharing of coupons in line at the stores? The letting someone go ahead of you in line? The buying of someone’s dinner? Extra toys to drop in a box? Giving a homeless man a homemade hat, gloves, and scarf? Praying to the people cutting you off as you drive to stores? Paying someone’s bill at the auto shop? (These are all things I and other experienced this year.) I am hoping to get MUCH better about spreading the Spirit rather than focusing on whether someone gives me what I want when they say “Merry Christmas!”

Love….To Be Continued…

Praying for you all!

Lord, may this reach one person that needed to read it. Your Will Lord!

My Husband says “WOMEN”….!!!!

We have plenty of battles in our house.  No, not between the Mom and the Dad, but yep you guessed it between the kiddo’s!  Who makes the mistake of interfering?  Come on you know you all did at least once.  What happens?  Anything good?  My journey to self discovery and sibling relationship or rivalry has been a bumpy dirt road.

From the get go I desired my kids to be best friends. To hug each other. To love and encourage one another. Blah Blah Blah and pigs flew right??  When this did not ALWAYS occur and the knock down fights occurred I stepped right in.  Threw in my 50 cents. I even some how managed to take sides when I did not have all the facts.  Yep, can you believe that? Then I had a very pivotal conversation with a relative that shared how when her kids were young they would come running, screaming, fighting and saying “so and so did this to me”…”well they did this to me” and so on.  She then proceeded to discipline them or at least one of them.  Flash forward to today and she is explaining to me that at one Christmas they were home sharing stories and she was learning that she nearly always punished the wrong one. She said if she had it to do again, then she would let them battle it out. This was a light bulb over my head. A profound moment for me.  God using this relative to share a parable with me. I then recall how my Mom worked when we were young and not always home to interfere with our fights. We just battled it out. Did it hurt our relationship at all. Nope, now my brothers, with my husband, are my best friends. This thought was another light bulb moment that sent me flashing me back to my college child psychology class hearing “siblings that are allowed to fight when young are more likely to be friends as adults”. From this moment I realized this, they fight, I interfere, someone is punished, and five minutes later they are best friends. I am then left wondering “what just happened here?” Finally, I gave up even getting involved even when they are horribly mean to each other. Instead, I stand in the wings praying for peace…in my life 🙂 … no seriously I do ask God to bring them peace. It works!

A recent example of this, though I can share something from at least 3 times a day usually from the middle girls, I will share just one story. I am showering when #1 daughter is drying her hands with the towel when #2 daughter grabs the towel from her saying “I need it more! My hands are more wetter!” So, goes the battle over a towel. I standing in the shower; apparently, have not learned my lesson, yet, so I throw in my 50 cents about being nice to each other, sharing, etc. I get the usual replies “she started it”, “she is mean”, “I do not like waiting”, etc etc I finally gave up.  I continue to then wonder what am I doing wrong that they fight so badly. Then I recall my promise to not interfere, to let them battle it out, and pray.  So, what happens not 7 minutes later? They are walking through the hall nearly hand in hand headed down stairs to play Barbie’s.  SERIOUSLY….and my husband just shakes his hand saying “WOMEN!”

I can honestly say that I have been going strong now for 2 months on not interfering and things between them all seems better than ever. I am sure more issues will arise and as they get older the issues most likely will become bigger. We are prepared to interfere when we feel it is a most. I am not saying that this as an expert on parenting or even an expert on MY KIDS just that this one little thing has helped preserve SOME sanity in our home. Hopefully, adult relationships as well.

God Bless! I lift this up to God and hope it finds someone that needs a light bulb moment. Praying for you all!

DISCLAIMER: I am not an expert on anything except my kids and our home. Even then I am learning every day to care for them in the best ways I know how. Please to do not take anything as if I am a professional. I am just a Momma on a journey of her own. Along that journey I am sharing my/our story. My posts are meant to entertain and encourage others. Do not take anything and use it in your own life without proper research, prayer, and discussion with a spouse. I am an advocate for family rights to do what is BEST for their family based on their family’s individual needs.